4 months ago

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The Lord of The Cannabis Rings is based on J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Fellowship of the Ring," and it's solely written for the community as a work of fiction. The actual chapters are condensed into a smaller format (cliff note-style) for easier understanding (The first half of each book is chapter 1, and the second half is chapter 2). All characters, incidents, places, and names are products of actual community members, J.R.R. Tolkien, and @WRITER43's baked imagination. Any similarities to locales and events are entirely fictitious and for purposes only:)

If you missed book one, you can be brought up to speed by reading chapters 1 and 2, and clicking the links provided below.

The Lord of the Cannabis Rings - Part One

The Lord of the Cannabis Rings - Part Two




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@Raz wakes to a repulsive smell in a strange bed made of hay next to his new trusty companion @Stoner, the half-baked pony who has been farting ever since eating the Lion's share of magic mushrooms he grazed along their journey to Rivendell. @Raz is feeling much better as the Hindu Kush @Carpediem applied to his knife wound appears to, in fact, have healing powers of the Hindu @Cannabis Gods.

The wizard @Psyceratopsb who has been sitting with @Raz, breaks off a piece of hashish and rolls a magic spliff sprinkled with smotion that he scored from the elven budtender @Jessica while at The @Smokeasaurusrex Inn, explains that he was put in prison, but refuses to elaborate until the smell emitting from the sleeping and half-baked pony - stops.

The Half-Baked Pony @Stoner

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@Psyceratopsb also identifies the Black @EasyRider Knights as the Nazgûl or Ringwraiths. Although not eliminated by the magic flood, they have been severely crippled.

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@Raz reunites with his friends, and he soon discovers that @Barge lives in Lord @Ufaz's house. @Barge asks to see the Ring, but before @Raz's eyes, the old hobbit turns into a greedy, nasty creature. @Raz hides the Ring away, and the awkward moment passes.

The next day, @Ufaz calls a Council to make a decision on what should be done with the Ring? They review the history of the Ring, from its forging to its disappearance in the Great River Anduin. The son of the Steward of Gondor @Razeiv, recalls his dream of Isildur's Bane, which he now discovers is the Golden @Ganja Ring, and @Carpediem reveals himself of the rightful King of Gondor and Isildur's heir.

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After @Barge and @Raz recount their experiences with the Ring, @Psyceratopsb rises and explains the Ring's disappearance and its reappearance in @Barge's possession. He explains how @Acid found the Ring, and when he emerged to search for the Ring, he found his way to Mordor, where he revealed the Ring's new bearer to @A4illusionist.

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The enemy immediately sent the Nine to look for the Ring. Meanwhile, @Psyceratopsb went to consult @A4illusionist the White, who attempted to convince the wizard to ally with the enemy, waiting patiently to take his place and overthrow him, @A4illusionist then imprisoned @Psyceratopsb when he refused his offer, who escaped with aid from the Eagles. This ultimate betrayal shocks many, as @A4illusionist was one of their strongest allies.

Although @Realkiki85 wants to use the Ring as a weapon, @Psyceratopsb and @Ufaz understand the Ring and its corruption. Even if @A4illusionist were destroyed, the new wielder of the Ring would become evil, even more so, the threat would remain imminent. Their only choice is to secretly send a small, misfit group of brave stoners into Mordor and cast the Ring into the Fires of Mount Doom, where it was forged.

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They hope @A4illusionist will not expect this secret mission, nor will he see a small group of stoners when his armies are moving. Although afraid, @Raz hobbits-up and volunteers to take the Ring. A group of nine community members, to match the Nine Ringwraiths are selected for the perilous mission: @Raz, @Psyceratopsb, @Carpediem, @Realkiki85, @Armshippie the elf, @Bench the dwarf, along with @Plug, @Stash, and @JoeSmoke, become the Fellowship of the Golden @Ganja Ring.

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Before they leave, @Barge gives @Raz his elven sword, @MaryJane, and a mailshirt made of pure hemp, the strongest and lightest fibers in Middle @Cannabis Earth. The elves also reforge @Sharminkona, so that @Carpediem can carry the sword against the enemy. The Fellowship begins their journey southward, but before they can reach the mountain, flocks of ravens appear to be scouting the landscape, spies of either @A4illusionist or Lord @Sativa.

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A blizzard strikes the Nine and @Stoner, the half-baked pony while they're on a mountain path, which forces them to retreat before they freeze to death or the snow buries them. Descending, they are attacked by vicious wargs, and it convinces them to find a safer path. They decide to take some bong hits and maneuver the Mines of Moria, which once upon a time was the greatest dwarven civilization, but are now controlled by foul creatures and orcs.


The entrance to the Mines of Moria is almost impassable and blocked by a noxious lake, but the Nine manages to reach the Doors of Durin. @Psyceratopsb's spells fail to open the door until a hashish question from @Stash suggests the password. As the Nine enters, a long, spikey tentacle comes out of the water and grabs @Raz by the balls. He evades capture and keeps his members intact, but twenty more tentacles shut the doors, trapping the Nine within.

Bothered that @Raz had his hobbit-hood put into jeopardy, @Psyceratopsb takes the lead. When the Nine stops at a cross path, @JoeSmoke accidentally drops his grinder that he just purchased from Lord @Indica into a well. The sound echoes loudly and is answered by the sound of banging bong hammers.

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@Raz hears faint footsteps behind them, and blazing eyes appear and watch them as they rest. Nonetheless, nothing approaches the Nine before they reach the other side. A lighted shaft leads them to the tomb of @Indaymers, one of @Bench's kin who recently fought to reclaim Moria. In the tomb, they discovered a hand-written ledger on a piece of Elements' rolling paper left by the elven historian @LordofTruth, revealed that the dwarves were viciously attacked and slain by orcs. As the Nine prepares to leave the tomb, orcs breach the chamber and attack them.

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Although, they barely survive the onslaught, a huge orc-chieftain spears @Raz. To everyone's relief and surprise, @Barge's hemp-fiber mailshirt saves his life. The Fellowship carries on to the Bridge of @GoldenDawn, a narrow span that crosses an abyss, and the last obstacle leading to the main gate. As the Fellowship runs across, @Psyceratopsb turns to see a new horror approach, called @Xtetrahedron.


@Xtetrahedron is a dreadful spirit of flame and shadow, Durin's Bane, the evil responsible for the downfall of Moria. @Psyceratopsb holds off @Xtetrahedron, then destroys the bridge to hurl it to the depths of Moria. As @Psyceratopsb turns his back, @Xtetrahedron's flaming whip unwinds and pulls the wizard down as well.

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Weeping, the remainder of the Nine flees, escaping the mines of Moria into the midday sun
Middle @Cannabis Earth.



Please Stay Tuned for Book 2, Chapter 2, Moria to Amon Hen - The Two Towers.



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I should have gotten medicated before reading this



Quite a universe! I don't think it's possible to keep up with all the references but I love everything I understand. :)


Thanks, the Witch of Mordor @Mayb, it's quite the job writing and keeping up with all the references, but the Ring must be destroyed:)

It's quite out of the box as the first and second, Looking forward to the third :)



How do you post multiple photos on the same post on mobile? I'm new to this community and I can't seem to figure it out.


I don't use my phone to upload images to a post, I use my laptop. Not sure if that helps?


I'm always on my phone so I've slways just used mobile but I might aswell try it out on my laptop!


Yes, it probably will work better:)

Wow i have just noticed this chapter...been a not busy and missed it.
Sorry about that, very irresponsible strider ;)

This is some funny stuff my man...

I am proud to be part of the Fellowship of the Golden @Ganja Ring and will carry on this sword till the very last bong!