11 months ago


The Hobbit was first published in 1937, by J.R.R. Tolkien and is being rewritten by @WRITER43 exclusively for the community as a work of fiction. The book contains 19 chapters, and following the introductory chapter, the rest of the chapters will be paired in a series for a total of 10 posts. All characters, incidents, places, and names are products of actual community members, J.R.R. Tolkien, and @WRITER43's baked imagination.

Certain community members from the LOTR series have been replaced due to them showing a lack of interest in being a part of the community's quest while others have been given a new character. Any similarities to locales and events are entirely fictitious and for purposes only.

This book is dedicated to @HerbnCrypto's family.




Out of the Frying-Pan into the Fire

When @Bundo stops running, he packs his pipe with a giant nug of Black D.O.G. that he scored from the rowdy dwarf, @JackDub. He soon realizes that he has made his way to the other side of the Misty Mountains. After he gets baked, he decides to go back and search for his companions. @Bundo is still wearing the Ring when he hears @Elliot and the dwarves arguing.

@Elliot is saying that they should go back and rescue @Bundo, but @HerbnCrypto is saying that @Bundo has most likely perished and his men could die in vain. @Bundo walks close to the group and takes the Ring off, and the group is surprised to see him.

@Relaylogix, "I think @HerbnCrypto is right, @Bundo is dead."

He tells them of his adventure and the encounter with the vile creature @Acid; however, he does not tell them about the Ring. Their journey continues because the Goblins will soon be on their trail. They have plenty to smoke but nothing to eat and @Bundo states that he's so hungry he could eat a pole cat's ass from the local beggar, @MoodBalls.

@MoodBalls, "I would like to see him try it!"

@Elliot, @Bundo, and the dwarves slide down a rocky slope in order to gain more ground on their journey. The night falls silent as they listen to the nearby wild wolves howling, which are known as Wargs. The dwarves and @Bundo who's helped by @D00k13 hurry to climb giant @cannabis trees to hide from them.

The Wizard who understands the Warg language hears the wolves talking about joining the Goblins for raids on nearby villages. @Elliot sets the wolves on fire with burning buds that he throws at them from his @cannabis tree, chasing them away. Meanwhile, standing on a @cannabis branch, @RealKiki85 taunts the Wargs by throwing pigshit and laughing at them.

@RealKiki85, "Eat that bitches!"

The Lord of the Eagles, @Smokeasaurusrex hears the commotion and gathers other eagles to investigate. Meanwhile, the Wargs join the Goblins and set fire to the @cannabis forest as they ravage through it.

The Goblins and Wargs build fires around the @cannabis trees, trying to smoke the stoners out and kill them. As @Elliot's tree goes up in flames, he's ready to leap to his death.

@Smokeasaurusrex swoops down and rescues him.

The other eagles carry the dwarves and @Bundo to their eyrie. The eagles are afraid to take them too far in their quest because men with bows will shoot arrows at them. Nonetheless, they give the expedition a safe place to rest for the night, and they also bring back wild game for them to roast and eat. The dwarves relish at the moment, and @Relaylogix, @FutureThinker, and @OffGrid provide the entertainment.

@RelayLogix, "Watch out bro, you're gonna roast your nuts!"

@FutureThinker, "I would rather do that than eat a pole cat's ass!"

@OffGrid, "If you fools fuck these nugs up, we'll have a problem!"


Queer Lodgings

The next morning after the group eats breakfast and enjoys a wake-n-bake, the great eagles take them to a large rock called @cannasseur.

@Elliot tells @Bundo and the dwarves that he must depart and leave them soon. The Wizard takes them to see @Self.Made.Bstrd the skin-changer who is a @cannabis farmer on vast lands some distance away. People call him the skin-changer because he can turn himself into a bear.

@Elliot introduces himself and @Bundo to @Self.Made.Bstrd, but he doesn't appear to be too friendly at first. @Elliot tells him a suspenseful story about how they escaped from the Goblins and Wargs and even how he killed the Great Goblin whom he called his bitch, but @Self.Made.Bstrd grows more interested and sympathetic toward the dwarves.

@Self.Made.Bstrd, "You killed the Great Goblin, I doubt that."

@Elliot, "Sliced that bitch's head clean off!"

The Wizard introduces them, and @Self.Made.Bstrd invites the entire group to stay for supper and places a jar of dank @cannabis in front of each of his guests. He informs the group about the dangers of the Mirkwood forest because they must cut through it in order to reach their journey east. Before @Bundo and the dwarves smoke themselves to sleep, @Elliot warns them not to go outside until dawn. @Bundo starts dreaming and hears loud growling outside, wondering if it's @Self.Made.Bstrd turning into a bear trying to come in and eat them.

When @Bundo wakes up the next morning, @Elliot has split and doesn't return until dusk. He tells the stoners that he found evidence of a gathering of bears the night before, and it led him back to the spot where the Wargs tried to roast them out of the @cannabis trees. He also informs them that the skin-changer has gone there too. The group uses this time to rest as they smoke, drink, and eat like kings while they wait.

The next dawn @Self.Made.Bstrd returns and tells the group he has confirmed @Elliot's wild story about killing @BluntSmoker, the Great Goblin. He also tells them he killed a couple of Wargs and Goblins himself the night before. He really likes his guests because he hates Goblins too.

@Self.Made.Bstrd outfits his new friends for their journey through Mirkwood with bows and arrows and well-provisioned ponies. He tells them not to bathe or drink the water in Mirkwood's enchanted stream and to send his ponies back when they reach the forest, and most importantly - not to stray off the path. He leads them to a small forest road, and the group continues their community's quest to Mirkwood.

During the fourth day, they arrive at the edge of the Mirkwood forest, and @Elliot reminds them to send the ponies back. He also informs them that he has other business that requires his immediate attention, but most importantly he expresses his concern for the group not to leave the path.



Please stay tuned for chapter 8, Flies and Spiders and chapter 9, Barrels Out of Bond.

If you missed the opening series of The Hobbit, you can get caught up to speed by clicking the links below.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3


Compliments of @Chipanda

#TheHobbit #Cannabis #StayMedicated

Get 4.2 Free Smoke Power On Sign Up To Start Your Journey On Smoke! The First Cannabis Community That Pays You To Post And Curate Content You Love..
Sort Order:  Trending

Totally great take on a classic. Love reading your chapters. With a grin ofcourse.


Thanks bro that means a lot because my whole purpose in doing this is strictly for the entertainment for those who enjoy reading a good and funny story by injecting the smoke community as its cast:)

good lol!
by the way used to be my favorite book when i was child!


Glad you liked it!