The Dark Knight is a production of DC Comics and Warner Bros, and it's being rewritten by @Groot exclusively for the smoke.io community as a work of fiction. All characters, incidents, places, and names are products of actual smoke.io community members, DC Comics, Warner Bros, and @Groot's stoned, storytelling imagination. Any similarities to locales and events are entirely fictitious and for smoke.io-entertainment purposes only!
I AM @GROOT
SMOKE.IO'S FIRST MAD-LIB WRITER
GIF-PICTUREBOOKS BY @GROOT ©2020
@D00K13 AS THE JOKER
Back in Slovakia at @Stonero's top-secret cultivation facility, three low-level street dealers @Canada, @Jeroen240, and @Relaylogix arrive claiming to have killed the Joker, laying his dead corpse on a propagation table wrapped in hemp-based smart pots. The ruse works as @D00k13 emerges from the smart pots and cuts @Stonero's tongue off with a pair of trimming scissors, stabs him in the mouth, and kills him where he stands.
@D00k13, "Is worth more than 1,000,000 BTC, don't ya think? I like you, but you do have a big fucking mouth!"
The Joker then tells the street dealers that he only has room for one of them and instructs them to fight each other to the death, and the winner will get an elite position on his team of crazy-stoned clowns. Meanwhile, @Unnamed takes the new F1-Phenotype hybrid @cannabis armor and travels to Hong Kong with @FutureThinker.
@Unnamed gives @FutureThinker a full-spectrum cell phone with HPS sonar technology that has the ability to remotely display visual images of the cell phone's current surroundings as well as recording any keystrokes from nearby computers and infiltrating the most complex firewall systems while sending @Unnamed real-time statistics on his new Oculus helmet designed by @FutureThinker.
@Unnamed and @FutureThinker are heading to see @ijmmai, the Chinese smoke coin accountant to cancel negotiations in person between @ijmmai's investment firm and @Curationbro Enterprises, which @Unnamed knows is a front and place for drug dealers like @Raz to laundry dirty smoke tokens. However, their real goal is to leave the full-spectrum cell phone by the receptionist's desk, so it can hack into @ijmmai's servers.
Later that night using the analytical data collected by the full-spectrum cell phone, @Unnamed adorning his new armor infiltrates @ijmmai's office by leaping off the top of the 420th floor of his high-rise Budscraper.
@Unnamed eliminates his protection and escapes with @ijmmai by tethering to a passing by millennium falcon piloted by @Offgrid who was just released from a 14-day quarantine enacted by the Canadian government for COVID-19.
The Dark @Cannabis Knight returns to @Stickeybudz City and delivers @ijmmai to the @Stickeybudx Police. @ijmmai makes a deal with @Acid, @zpzn, and @Xen to rat out his foreign Rudex connections in return for being placed on smoke.io's witness protection plan. As a result, all of the low and high-level street dealers and @cannabis mob bosses are placed under arrest; however, @Raz manages to escape the sweep and agrees to pay the Joker $500,000.000 BTC for his protection.
@D00k13, "Now that's a wise investment if I do say so myself!"
The Joker sends an encrypted broadcast message across all smartphones and LED television sets to every smoker in @Stickeybudz City and informs the @stoners that he will start killing innocent civilians if The Dark @Cannabis Knight does not turn himself into the @Stickeybudz Police and reveal his true identity, starting with the @Cannabis Batman impersonator @JackDub.
@JACKDUB AS THE SCARECROW
The Joker drops subtle hints about who he plans to kill next based on the high THC levels left on his recently renewed medical marijuana card.
The @Stickeybudz Commissioner @Bench, Supreme Court @Cannabis Justice @Herbygirl, and @Xen make emergency plans to deal with the Joker's threats, but despite their best efforts, @Herbygirl's Chevy Tahoe is blown to smithereens shortly after she leaves the medical dispensary in Beverlybuds with a week's worth of high-grade premium @cannabis and a month's supply of edibles.
Meanwhile, @Xen tries to convince @Bench that the high levels of THC left on Joker's medical marijuana card came from an experienced grower, but as @Xen shotguns a Hop Chronic THC-infused larger, he turns around to see @Bench doing the fish after a massive bong hit and collapses as the @Cannabis Angel of Death arrives.
THE @CANNABIS ANGEL OF DEATH
During a smoke.io campaign and fundraiser, @Acid ask @zpzn to marry him; however, before @zpzn can answer @Acid, he is locked into a veg room by @Unnamed as the Joker arrives at the smoke sesh, demanding to know where @Acid is hiding.
@D00k13, "Tell me where @Acid is or I'll send your wife a pic of you and your sexy secretary getting it on!"
When @D00k13 is unable to locate @Acid's whereabouts, he approaches the stunning @zpzn and insults her, but @zpzn isn't having any of his bullshit and fights back.
@zpzn, "Take your grubby hands off of me before I take your Jokerhood!"
The Dark @Cannabis Knight arrives and tells the Joker to let @zpzn go or he will suffer a long and drawn-out painful death.
@Unnamed, "Before I stick a hot dabber in your eye and slice your throat like a stuck pig!"
The Dark @Cannabis Knight ends up fighting the Joker and his henchmen in a brutal and blood-spilled fight-to-the-death as the Joker drops @zpzn from the helipad of the highrise building, and The Dark @Cannabis Knight dives at hyperspeed in an attempt to save his one and only true love from certain death upon impact.
@Unnamed, "I am The Dark @Cannabis Knight - Don't ever fuck with me or my girl!"
If you missed the opening to the series, click the links below.
END OF PART THREE:
Please Stay Tuned for Part Four:
Part 1: https://smoke.io/offtopic/@groot/the-dark-cannabis-knight
I AM @GROOT
Part 2: https://smoke.io/offtopic/@groot/the-dark-cannabis-knight-part-2
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SMOKE.IO'S FIRST MAD-LIB WRITER